Courage Through the Covid-19 Storm: Change Cognitive Distortions

Tips for THRIVING

Tip #3 Healthy thinking

Listen to this blog post here https://anchor.fm/karen-sue-murdy/episodes/Courage-Through-the-Covid-19-Storm-Change-Cognitive-Distortions-ecgrq3
"The sky is falling; the sky is falling!" declares Chicken Little when his head is hit by an acorn...a perfect example of a cognitive distortion. Cognitive distortions are inaccurate thoughts that perpetuate negative thoughts and feelings.

Early in my career I was blessed to attend a workshop led by David Burns, M.D. a leader in the field of cognitive behavior therapy. In working with my patients I have found, if I can help them identify these cognitive distortions, they are able to change them. By thinking more accurately they live a healthier and better life. In these unusual days of Covid-19, it is important for each of us to recognize cognitive distortions and change them to healthier thoughts. Yes, all around us, very difficult circumstances are indeed happening. But taking hold of our distortions and creating healthier thinking patterns will help us deal positively with the current crisis.

Here are a few examples of cognitive distortions and ideas for healthy thinking:
Cognitive distortion of all or nothing thinking: "Everything is horrible." In these changing times of stay at home orders, a father of three teen-agers from N.C. reports in today's WSJ about his family, "We're having fun together at a way deeper level then we have in the past. I love spending time with them. It's intoxicating."  Healthier thinking: "Not everything is horrible.Yes, some things are horrible, but some things are even better than they were before."

Cognitive distortion of emotional reasoning: "I must be stupid." This morning, my husband, who has been doing a stellar job of spinning on a dime to not only adapt to all kinds of technology changes with steep increase of telemedicine, but also helping his frightened patients with making changes, frustratingly announced to me, "I'm just stupid" when he couldn't figure out how to join a meeting with a new technology platform.  I quickly reminded him, "No, you are not stupid. You are on technology overload. You have just not figured out how to do this one yet!" Healthier thinking: "I am in the process of learning so much new."

Cognitive distortion of overgeneralization: "I am going to starve." My son, who owns a small business-along with so many others in a similar situation-worries about not only paying his rent and buying food for his family, but also making payroll so his employees can do the same thing. Healthier thinking: "I currently have food in my cupboard. Grocery stores have food. The earth is still producing food. I may have to make an adjustment to my usual eating patterns, but for now, I still have many options for food."

Cognitive distortion of blame: "You just don't listen." Unfortunately that was what I screamed at my family the other day.  Sometimes it can be hard to live day in and day out with the same people and to be out of our usual routines. When situations get sticky, it is easy to blame others and not take responsibility for our own attitudes and behaviors. A response reflecting healthier thinking: "When you have a moment, I would like to explain what I am thinking."

We have this hanging on our refrigerator to remind and help us rethink:

What are your cognitive distortions? Identify them.  How can you change those thoughts to healthier thinking? (See ways to deal with cognitive distortions on handout.)

The Apostle Paul addresses thinking, "Finally, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." (Philippians 4:8).

Covid-19 Challenge: Set a timer for 60 minutes and when it rings, gather everyone in your household to take a one minute walk outside and around a tree or two, each person sharing something for which s/he is thankful now. REPEAT. 

(If you are alone, do the same, but text someone what you are thankful for when you come back inside.)

UP NEXT TIME:Tip #4 Don't worry about tomorrow.